I find myself in a place where I now struggle with things that I thought were long gone. I’m in spiritual quicksand, a celestial spider web. The harder I struggle, the more entangled I become. I am at the point of not resisting now, at least not struggling so hard. I know that my own efforts are ineffectual, I seem to have the Midas touch… everything I touch turns to sludge. “O wretched man that I am, who will deliver me from this body of death?” So for now I struggle as a man in two worlds, longing to be at peace in one. And trying to apprehend what Andrew Murray puts best.
“I said a little while ago that there is many a man who has learned the lesson, It is impossible with men, and then he gives up in helpless despair, and lives a wretched Christian life, without joy, or strength, or victory. And why? Because he does not humble himself to learn that other lesson: With God all things are possible.
Your religious life is every day to be a proof that God works impossibilities; your religious life is to be a series of impossibilities made possible and actual by God’s almighty power. That is what the Christian needs. He has an almighty God that he worships, and he must learn to understand that he does not need a little of God’s power, but he needs – with reverence be it said – the whole of God’s omnipotence to keep him right, and to live like a Christian.”
This is the God I seek, the God of the Impossible. All of Him.