Ah, Spring is in the air, birds and bees are flying, buzzing and doing whatever it is that they do, but can it last?
Contrary to what you may hear grumpy old men, and cranky old women say when they’re safely off on their own at the hardware store or fabric shop, yes. Love can last. The romance can last. The fire can continue to heat things up, and add zest to life. That’s an important piece of information to know, to file away.
“For centuries, humans have speculated about the mysteries of romantic love. One question that has puzzled theorists, therapists and laypeople is whether intense romantic love can last.” (Acevedo et al, Dept. of Psychology, Stony Brook University)
Acevedo and friends performed functional Magnetic Resonance Imaging (fMRI) on the brains of couples who claimed to be in long term, intense romantic relationships and found that, unlike Unicorns or Mermaids, it does exist. You can be in love, and it can last. And if you are in love like that, you don’t need to be committed to an institution. In fact, it will make you healthier, all the way around. Hmmm. Of course, knowing this can be threatening for those of us who have tried, and failed, at love. Few of us care to contemplate our failures, to ask “why” long enough until we’ve discovered the root of the problem. Those who do can go on to live fulfilling, love-filled lives. Which is not a bad thing. At all 😉
I was talking with a new friend the other day, slightly more mature than myself. And he went on to describe his wife, and how crazy he was about her, pointing to her pictures which adorned his office all around, and all the things that they do together. Ya know, you can tell when someone is faking it. You just can, I can. He wasn’t, and after 30 some years of marriage, this guy was still crazy about his wife. Still looked for ways to please her, engage her, and help her fulfill her destiny, her design. He had discovered something very important, sustaining about life together. And was sharing it. With me. I suddenly has a speck of something under my contact lens… dangit.
Acevedo and friends again…”For the first time, the neural correlates of long-term romantic love were investigated. Results showed activation specific to the partner in dopamine-rich brain regions associated with reward, motivation and ‘wanting’ consistent with results from early-stage romantic love studies.”
So, the Golden Fleece does exist, and in its finding you will become Kings and Queens of your own rare kingdom.
You know, every good story we tell has borrowed its theme from a larger one, a much Greater One.
- Brain Scans Could Reveal If Your Relationship Will Last (livescience.com)
- Difference Romantic Love and Lasting Intimacy (gaylekimball.wordpress.com)
- Love and Health: Romantic Love vs. Unselfish Love (trutherator.wordpress.com)
- Sex or Love? New Study Shows Women AND Men Prefer Romance to Sex (alternet.org)
- The Truth about Romance (head-heart-health.com)